3/12/07

some Do's and Don'ts to Cab Riding

Since I'm feeling somewhat verbose today ...

DO: Talk to your cab driver. You might enjoy it.

DO: Turn on your damned porch light!! If you expect to get to the airport at some un-godly hour and I have to get out and walk up to every single house to see a damned address because the entire street has their lights off then damn it, I'm going to be late.

DO: Call back and cancel your call if your idiot friend comes back and you decided to ride w/their drunken ass back to where ever.

DO: Let me know if you aren't feeling well. Don't make me find out the hard way. It makes for an unhappy cabbie.

DO: Actually have the means to pay the fare before you get in the cab.

DON'T: Sit in the front seat if you're the only person in the cab other than me. I load up the front seat w/crap for this very reason. And don't insist on it even after I ask you to sit in back. It's a comfort issue. Mine. Not yours.

DON'T: Let the first words out of your mouth something along the lines of a) 'have you ever been robbed?' b) 'do you ever feel scared?' c) 'ever get somewhere and have someone run without paying?' Any combination of these will likely get you on the side of the road waiting for another cab.

DON'T: Complain to me that every single cab driver you've ever gotten doesn't speak english. Not my fault. When the powers that (shouldn't) be decide to make it illegal to work in this country if English isn't your first language THEN you can complain. To them. Not me.

DON'T: Call the 3 major cab companies in Ptld because you're in a hurry and take whichever shows first w/out calling the others and cancelling. Not cool.

DON'T: Touch the driver! Just ... don't.

DON'T: Flash the camera. Seriously. I don't want to see your boobs. I have my own and odds are fairly decent they're better than yours.

DON'T: Get jealous when your bf is giving me directions. I am no one's competition. If he's willing to go out w/your drunk ass then I probably don't want him anyway.

And a BIG DON'T: Don't look down on me because I'm a cab driver. I'm not living on the street. Or popping out kids to live off welfare. Or trying to cheat the system. I HAVE a job. It may not be glamorous, or something you would do. But give me the smallest modicum of respect for having a job and being able to use that word in proper context.

Happy Cabbing All!

9 comments:

Manic Witch said...

"Big Don't"--are you kidding? I applaud ANYONE who can do what you do. Seeking strangers into your car (personal bubble) and having to put up with their "I'm so much better than you because I wear a suit" blah, blah, blah. It looks like you do have some degree of freedom as to who gets into your cab and who doesnt.

I'm cheering you on. You have a rough, thankless job. But too many people would be pissed off if you weren't there.
And I LOVE your blog.

Anonymous said...

Do they ever give you driving tips? I think that's excuse enough to drop them off on the curb in the middle of nowhere.

Anonymous said...

ahahaha...dont touch the driver. Nice.

Dave2 said...

Oooh... I hugged the driver. I don't even want to know what kind of punishment this infraction of the rules bestows upon me. But at least I didn't do it while you were driving!

Paradise Driver said...

Amen to those do's and don'ts.

Especially:
DON'T: Touch the driver! Just ... don't.

Unknown said...

This is all too true. I don't really ever have an issue with some of the points though, mostly because I'm not a female driver. I don't mind them flashing the camera and their girlfriend's seldom are jealous of me... The one that stands out though is the sitting in the front seat thing, no one ever even thinks to sit up front here, unless it's 4 passengers.

My favorite point is "have the means to pay before you get in the cab". I hate stopping at the ATM or meeting a friend at the other end.

Karl said...

Ha, thanks for the lessons. Wish I'd been able to ride in your cab the other night for donuts. I would have kept my breasts covered and everything.

Anonymous said...

Well, now I'm all curious about your breasts! Which is not to say that I doubt they are better than mine :P

Catherine

F.B. Cabby said...

Nice, very well put! except for the part about flashing the camera...