I met the 2nd coolest DTV fella not too long ago (the coolest one I ended up giving him my old PS1 for his kid). He and I were chatting and having all kinds of fun shooting the shit and trading stories: I told him about a house I rented a room in with a couple of other guys where the owner came down from Washington during the week and stayed in his room above the garage, all week long, and we hardly ever saw him. Turned out he had 4 different satellite dishes and vcr's set up to record porn all weekend long so when he came down here he would watch the porn. That's all he did. Weirdo. Anyway, DTV guy told me this one:
He: You know that bar on Powell, the small one, about 65th or so?
Me: Um, Gator's maybe.
He: Yeah, that might be it. Anyway, I had to go there one day to hook up DTV for the owner's brother. His brother is somewhat mentally handicapped and missing most of one of his hands. It's a tiny little room with a huuuuge tv, a bed, lots of dvd's - enough to cover an entire wall - and a whole lot of magazines stacked on the floor, on the nightstand, etc. As I'm looking around I realize the dvd's are all porn. Dude had enough porn to start his own store, not kidding.
As I was working I see on his nightstand a roll of paper towels and a big bottle of lotion. So I did what I had to do, as quickly as possible. As I was getting ready to leave and was explaining to him how to use the remote he put the remote under his left arm and reached up to shake my hand. There was no way I was touching that thing 'cuz it was pretty obvious where it had been so I just handed him the remote and skeedaddled on outta there.