I got sent to grab a fella from about 26th-ish and Ainsworth, NE Ptld one early evening. It was still fairly nice out and there was this quite-a-bit-older black gent watering his lawn when I pulled up in front of his home.
Me: Hi there. Are you Jacob?
He: Ay-yup. He eyeballed me.
Me: OK, well then, I guess I'm here to pick you up.
He: I didn't call no cab.
Me: Ah. OK. Lemme check here a second, I might have the wrong address. I stick my head back in the car door and eyeball the computer screen quickly. I check the address on the screen and his: same. Well, it looks like this is the correct address. And you say your name is Jacob, yes?
Me: Weeelll, maybe someone in your house called a cab? Izzat possible?
He: Ha-yell no.
Me: Oh, I know, one second ... I read off the phone number that was given to me with the order. Is that your number?
Me: Well, there must be some sort of mistake then. I'm sor -
He: Dayum RIGHT you gots it wrong bitch. I didn't CALL no cab.
Me: Whoa. Sir, just because there's an error doesn't mean you need to be calling me -
He: Don't you TELL me what to do on MY proptee bitch. I TOLE you I didn't call no cab. Same thing I tole that other cab just left.
Me: Another cab was sent to this address?
He: What I said ain't it?
Me: Ah. Then someone must be playing some sort of childish game. I'm sor-
He: You say I'm playin some GAME?!!
Me: No sir. I said "someone -"
He: And by "someone" you means ME. I knows you do. I done TOLE you ... And dude turned his hose on me!!!
Me: GAH!! (That one's for you Wayne) and I ducked back into my cab quick enough to only get a little bit wet.
I was so busy laughing I could barely drive; only made it about 1/2 a block (out of hose range) before I had to pull over, get out of the car and shake myself like the dog he accused me of being.