12/26/06

"My momma always tole me white bitches was crazy."

Had to go pick up the current ex bf (cab driver as well) from work and we were heading home about 5a (I own my car so I take it home, he doesn't) when I get a phone call from dispatch asking, pleading, begging even for me to run out towards Gresham to get this older lady that had taken a cab earlier but the other driver was no longer working for that evening. We had no other cabs on that side o' town and she was going quite a ways so I said yes.

I get to where she is and ask dispatch to call her as it's still dark out and no lights were on in the house. A light popped on and a young lady stepped onto the porch to give me the ol' "one finger" that she was on her way out. J and I chat for a bit and finally this little ol' black lady shuffles down the steps and walks towards the car leaning on the young lady. They make it right about to the front of the car, in the headlights and the older lady stops and just stares at me. Says something to her companion, and shakes her head. She turns and tries to start back into the house and her friend says something to her, she shakes her head, but turns around and walks back to the car. J gets out and opens the back door for her, she gets in and buckles up. Her friend goes back into the house.

Me: Good morning.

She: ...

Me: OK. Where we off to this morning?

She: I gave the address to the nice young lady on the phone. I don't know why she sent YOU to get me though. I told her not to send no women.

Me: Huh. Well, I'm the only cab this side of town. Where can I take you?

She: What's a woman doing driving a cab anyway? Ain'tchew got no man?

Me: This is my man here. And I drive a cab. So where can I take you?

She: That last cab driver didn't get no money from me so I tole him I'd give it to him when he came back. Where is he?

Me: He is done driving for the night, but if you like I can give it to him.

She: No. No. No. I don't give my hard earned money to no woman. Huh uh. Not me. I'm not stupid ya know.

Me: Well ... how about ...

She: But I'll give it to the young man sitting next to you. I trust him.

Me: Well then, lucky for the other driver. Now, can I take you somewhere?

She: Now don't you be rude to me missy. I don't need no shit from no white woman. My momma tole me not to take any shit from no white woman. You're nuts. Alla ya. Crazy bitches.

Me: Excuse me, did you just call me a 'crazy bitch' ? You don't even know me. I might be a nice person.

She: Oh no you ain't. I knows you ain't. My momma always said white bitches was crazy. And I always did what my momma said.

I was just in shock. Sitting there staring at her, then I look up at J and he's laughing.

She: to J Now Sweetie, you going to take this check from me to give to that other nice young man that brought me out here? then to me But not YOU. You a crazy bitch.

Me: Still in shock was I. I'm sorry, but we don't take checks. Do you have any other form of payment to pay me for the ride we haven't gone on yet?

She: Hell no. I'm done talking to you. I'll talk to the sweet man in the seat in front of me. How you dooon baby?

Me: Excuse me, but you HAVE to talk to me. Just the way it is. Do you, or do you NOT have some other form of payment?

She: to J You want to tell that white bitch to shut the hell up so we can talk? by the by, J is white as well.

Me: No. He isn't going to say anything to someone as mean as you are. If you don't have any other form of payment I'm afraid I can't give you a ride anywhere.

She: to J again You better tell this bitch to take me where I wanna go and do it NOW. I don't have to put up with no shit from some snotty white bitch. to me YOU DON'T OWN ME BITCH!!

Me: I think I'm going to go get that young lady that helped you out here. I'll be back in a moment.

She: Damn right you bitch. Tell ME what to do. Think I'm going to go NOwhere with any woman driver. I tole that nice lady at your office ...

I got out at this point. Whew. Turned out to be her granddaughter. She came back out and got her back in the house. J and I went home.


6 comments:

Dave2 said...

Lovely. I shudder to think what my reaction would have been if somebody called me a "crazy bitch" in my own cab. I'd like to think that I'd be as calm and patient as you were, but...

Anonymous said...

You have the patience of a saint. I'm glad you didn't end up taking her anywhere, and I feel sorry for the poor schmo who apparently got stiffed. Gresham is FULL of losers.

Crabbie said...

Maybe (hopefully?) she had some kind of alzheimer's or other dementia.

Eugene Salomon said...

At least with someone like this you know they're crazy so you can just patronize them. It's the ones that aren't so obvious that can really get to me. Hey, love your blog - adding you to my roll.

Anonymous said...

Holy cow! That's crazy.

Unknown said...

I hate crazy bitches. I like your blog;-)