Talk about trying to "... sink my spirits"

(thank you Sarah! :)

I got sent to the Acropolis to pick up some dude and - turns out - his 2 women at about 11p. One he knows, the other is friend of his friend, just met. The Acrop is one of the more popular strip joints in town. Lots of ppl go there, especially those from outta town. Just a few miles south of dntn.

Seems they got booted outta there early 'cuz (my opinion) dude was being a dick. He's drunk, the girls aren't but they're pretty much going along w/what he says. And he's saying a LOT.

He: Take us dntn to the Crowne Room. You know where that is?

Me: Yup. How ya'll doing tonight?

He: ignores me and starts bitching at the Friend Of the Friend I don't know what the FUCK I said to you to turn you into such a bitch but you don't even KNOW me. What the fuck? I want to know. You stopped talking to me before we even got kicked out. What the FUCK is wrong with you? HUNH? she ignores him and stares out the window - she is sitting behind me

Friend: in a very quiet voice Please don't talk to her that way.

He: Shut up. You know what I'm talking about. Why can't you even talk to me? HUNH? I mean. Damn.

FOF: Please just leave me alone.

He: OOOOHHH. NOW you talk to me. You wouldn't talk to me all fucking night and NOW you talk to me. I mean. SHIT. I know what it is. You think it's about the money. Just because I grew up in Lake Oswego and have all the money in the fucking world you think I'm a dick. But I'm here to tell you Sweetheart that has nothing to do with it. Sure, my parents are rich. SURE I can get any woman I want but I don't even WANT you and you're being a bitch to me. I tell you what, it's NOT about the money. It's about YOU being a bitch.

Friend: Please. Just stop yelling at her.

He: WHAT? Now you're on HER side? What the fuck??? I tell you what BABE, I could buy and sell 10 of you bottle blond bitches and you would all be naked on your fucking KNEES scrubbing my fucking TOILET and fucking LOVING IT.

They both just looked down at their laps and didn't say anything. Well, I had heard enough.

Me: Dude, seriously. Stop yelling in my cab.

He: looked at me for a minute Let me tell you what happened and then maybe YOU can tell me why she thinks I'm being such a fucking asshole. We were in the bar

Me: interrupting Dude. I really don't want to hear your story, I just want you to stop yelling in my cab.

He: But this bitch is

Me: again DUDE. Stop calling the girls names and stop yelling in my cab. Seriously. I don't want to hear it any longer.

He: Sheeeet. What the fuck do YOU know anyway??

Me: pulling over I know you need to get out.

Everyone just kinda looks at me for a few seconds.

He: Yeah. Maybe I DO I was tired of riding with you anyway. But I tell you what, I am paying for these bitches rides because neither one of them have any fucking money so if you want to get paid then you aren't going to kick us out.

Me: I'm sorry you misunderstood me. I am kicking YOU out. Not the girls. And I will give the girls a ride wherever it is they need to go. For free.

He: Fine. opening the door What the FUCK EVER. and before he gets out he has one last parting shot at me Hey. Ya know what? Stay fat bitch.

Me: couldn't help it, I started laughing Oh wow! All your mommy and daddy's money and that's the BEST parting shot you could come up with?? They must not have spent much on your education Doll. Get the hell outta my cab.

He does. Slams the door and walks off.

Me: So. You girls still want to go to the same bar downtown?

After they got done staring at me they say yes.

FOF: Wow. Everyone was catering to him all night. I can't believe you talked to him like that.

Me: Dude was being a dick. I don't have to listen to that shit even if you do. jab jab

Friend: Still. We can pay for the cab ride by the way so you don't have to worry about it. Thank you though. He was outta control. And disrespectful. Oh my God. I can't believe he said that. You aren't even that big.

Me: I've been called a lot worse than that Darlin'. Trust me. It's all part of the job.

So as we're tooling along the girls are chatting about how they're going to get him to pay for the vacation they're taking the next week. I hear 'Hey, we can just say that my feet hurt and that the cab driver wasn't mean to us like she was to him.'

Apparently for some, money does make the world go 'round.


Sizzle said...

I. . . don't even know girls like that. Most women I know would rip that guy a new one- me included. I love it when you stand up. I admire it!

"You're not even that big" REALLY?! Jesus.

Ry said...

Oh Lordy.. where does one start with this??? Bless you Trixie for setting the ass straight... apparently money can buy you anything... "bottle blonde bitches" huh, now there's one to take home to momma... lordy...

Anonymous said...

Thank you for upping your rate of posting. I always enjoy reading your experiences!

Arthemise said...

I just can't understand those girls' mentality. No amount of money is worth putting up with abuse like that. Must have shocked the hell out of him to meet a REAL woman for a change.

Donna said...

Unbelievable. Oh, and what Anonymous said.

Iron Fist said...

Stay classy, Lake O People. Also: greedy.

Anonymous said...


There's also "Lake All Gringos", "Lake I'm Neato", "Lake We Beat Hos", "Lake Wife Beat Zone", "Lake Aren't We Slow", and "Lake to Hell We Go" (even though a few don't really rhyme!)

There's another nickname for lake o, and it's all too true, but it's not really appropriate to write, or to say for that matter; it has to do with Lake Oswego's all white population and non existent African American population: Lake No ..... & you probably get the rest!

Oh and the comment, "you're not even THAT big"?! Id be like, "uhhh, thanks, bitch, you're not even THAT fuckked in the head." (sorry, :/ but grrr!!!!)

I think I can describe about 90% of PDXers in five words, and they all rhyme*:

Portlanders are:
Depressive, Excessive & Passive Aggressive, but most of all, Unimpressive!

Oh & a rhyming word that describes what Portland is not (but frantically claims to be): Progressive

*(just so i don't offend anyone: I'm a portland native, born & raised. so baaaack off :P )

Anonymous said...

oh & no problem, trixie <3 as a loud mouthed, young looking, (i'm 23, but definitely look like i'm 12) female, i know how desperately vindictive pdxers can be (especially the men. well, especially the men to the women, because the men here are girrrrly and afraid of other men, and love an easy target),

the typical attitude:

"meh, picking on someone my own size is too fair and evenly matched. i like a niiiice, easy fight. that way, if i win, i mark it down as a 'HELL YEA' for my ego and if i lose, i can just be like, 'well that was just a dumb bitch anyways'."

Anonymous said...

PS Im sorry for spaming comments on this post but i wanted to say:

Your stories roooock! I love clicking on the bookmark (you're on my bookmark TOOLBAR, i might add!) & being able to read a new story from you, every time!
Thank you for continuously updating :)

Anonymous said...

Awesome one :p