"Well. OK, I did call a cab, but I didn't call you."

I get sent to a strip joint to get one of the girls, apparently she had to wait awhile because she sounded like she’d been imbibing while waiting. I call her number ….

Me: Hey there. This is your taxi, do you still need a ride?

She: Wait. What? WHO is this?

Me: This is your taxi. Do you. Still need. A ride?

She: Noooo. I didn’t call a cab.

Me: looking at the order on the screen Ah. Sorry. This is the number I have to reach Anya.

She: Well. I am Anya. But I didn’t call a cab. How did you get this number?

Me: The voices in my head told me to call you.

She: … What? WHO is this?

Me: Again. This is your taxi. You called a taxi, I showed up to give you a ride. That’s how it works. sometimes you need to be specific w/the inebriated.

She: Weeeelll, OK. I did call a cab, but I didn’t call YOU. My driver already showed up, with my name and phone number on his screen. I don’t think you’re a cab driver. I want to know who exactly you are and why you are calling me this late. RIGHT now.

Me: Ah. So apparently you called both companies. there are only 2 in town with computer screens Have a good night.

She: Wait a minute. Wait a minute. I want to know who you are.

Me: I told you, I’m your cab driver.

She: You sound like a woman.

Me: … so do you.

She: Don’t be a smart ass.

Me: Sorry. Just stating the obvious as you did.

She: …

Me: Did you get the text message that your cab was on the way?

She: Is THAT what that was all about?

Me: Yes. So you would have my cab number and didn’t get in the wrong cab when more than one of us showed up. Modern technology, gotta love it.

She: Why is your number blocked?

Me: It’s my personal number. I don’t give it to everyone.

She: So how am I supposed to call you back to prove that you’re a cab driver?

Me: Do you really need to “prove” I’m a cab driver?

She: Yes. It’s 3 in the morning and you‘re calling me. I want to make sure you are who you say you are.

Me: So, I give you my number, you call me back, I tell you that I am actually a cab driver, of course you believe me because I tell you I am and then what … you are going have the cab you are in turn around and come back here so you can get in my cab?

She: Of course not. Why would I?

Me: Exactly. So why would I give you my number?

She: …

Me: Have a good night. click

1 comment:

RT Koenig said...

Loved the story. I used to drive a Yellow Cab in Memphis.
One night, I get a call to pick up a drunk at a bar. When I pulled up, the bartender is holding the woman up. She gets in, I flip the meter and off we go.
Naturally, my first question is "Where to?"
"Home" she says.
"OK, where's home?"
She looks at me and says, "Why should I tell you? I don't even know you."
This went on for 10 min. while I drove around the block. Finally, we were back at the bar where we'd started. I told her, "We're home."
She smiled and jumped out.